Fritzzy

[Bryson Towler]

Oh brother where art thou?

Where has your face been? wait don't answer that Wait don't answer that.

So that time with the big jolly fat guy is approaching. You know? The one with flying deer.

You want anything for Christmas? I'm being efficient this year. Look at me. Being early and shit. Only because I know what I want but

Bryce

[Fritz Towler]

I've been living my life. Where have you been?

Oh yeah, so it is! Ha.

Of course I want something for Christmas. I just dunno know what yet. What about you?

- Fritz

[Bryson Towler]

Where have I been? Well, there's this place called Hogwarts I attend. That's usually where I spent most of my time.

Dont tell me you forgot Christmas? How do you not know? Surely you have an idea or something. Well, I mean, I know what I want. But I asked first.

Bryce

[Fritz Towler]

Bryce,

No way! That's ace! Now being a smartarse, yeah?

I didn't forget about Christmas. It's just that I don't tend to care until the week of. Again, no, I don't have any idea what I want. A hot girl wrapped in nothing but a bow?

Dude. Just tell me what you want.

- Fritz

[Bryson Towler]

It really is though. And were get to use magic. Are you just now realizing this? Oh Fritz. I think we need to spend more quality time together.

So are you telling me all my gifts are last minute? No extra special thought put into them? Ouch. And I'm sorry, I'm going to need an idea I can actually work with that doesn't involve a slap in the face for me.Should I just get you the bow?

Well not with that attitude. So there are these quidditch tickets I thought were available. That or a cat. Wait no. Get me cat.

Bryce

[Fritz Towler]

Byrce,

No, we don't. You just need to grow up.

Of course I put extra special thought into your gifts - shopping last minute isn't quite as easy as you might think. If you get me the bow, there had better be a hot girl tied up in it.

You want a cat over Quidditch tickets?

- Fritz

---

((ooc: wow, in fritz's other letter, there was supposed to be a STOP in his first question. =P ))

[Bryson Towler]

You just need to stop being a dick.

Oh really? Is that because everyone else is shopping last minute and you have to fight the crowds and can never find anything? Sounds like the perfect system. Again, anything else that is possibly easier for me to manage?

I want both really. But I just picked the least likely to happen. But no, I was looking into Puddlemere United tickets. I thought it would be fun to go to a match.

Bryce

[Fritz Towler]

Nah, don't think I will. (:

Nope, there's never any crowds of last-minute shoppers. There is some, but it's usually people getting meaningless little things like cards or bows or wrapping paper or sweets.

Alright, what about a PlayWizard calender? Is that simple enough?

Hey now. Are you doubting my abilities to get you a cat? Okay, I'll think about it!

- Fritz

[Bryson Towler]

Then who says I should grow up? Sorry but once you work on that problem, we'll see about me growing up. And did you put a smilie face? Or are my eyes wrong?

Ah. And you just get the good stuff? Sheesh. PlayWizard? I'm pretty sure all you see is naked women. Don't stop now, people might think you're gay. sarcasm if you couldn't tell Sometimes when I see tissues in your room, I would like to imagine that maybe you were crying at Titanic or something.

Uh yeah No, of course not. I'm doubting your want to get me a cat. But really? Awesome.

[Fritz Towler]

Because I said so. Yes, I did put a smilie face. Something wrong?

Duh. I'm the master. Like I haven't heard that before. Got anything else? No, those tissues are for the girls who cry at Titanic. But seriously, when I watched it Eli once, I was toasted and did really cry.

Well, I'm not particularly fond of the animal, but it's YOUR present - not mine.

- Fritz

[Bryson Towler]

Well, you didn't listen to what I said, so I don't think I'll be growing up anytime soon. Oh no, no problem. I'm just not use to smilie faces from you. It makes you seem happy or something.

What am I? The fly? Oh I have plenty more but I like throwing them out when the time calls for it, not just to prove a point. Because if I tell you then there's no surprise and less humor.

What girls? That Eli chick? She doesn't really seem like a crier to me. Did you scratch out the word cry? Wait. Fritz, did you cry at Titanic? Oh this is gold. Also if we are saying the tissues are for Titanic, for my mental health lets say the lotion if for your feet.

How can you not like cats? Like I said both is good. Why don't you surprise me?

Bryce

[Fritz Towler]

Ah, but I'm the older brother and therefore, you should listen to me. Hey, I am a very happy person. Smilie faces are my bros.

What does that even mean - the fly? Are you referencing something I don't know again, Bryce? Ah, but see - there will never be any surprise and there will never be any humor, either.

No, Eli doesn't cry. She just punches people in the face to show her affection. No, I didn't cry at Titanic, you idiot. The lotion is for the girls that come over. I like to give them massages - know what I mean?

I dunno, they're evil? I'll definitely surprise you.

- Fritz

[Bryson Towler]

All the more reason for me not to listen to you, of course. Pulling the big brother card doesn't usually work on me. But wait. I thought I was your bro? Are you cheating on me?

The master and the fly? Where they catch the fly in that old martial arts trick? Oh forget it. I mean, I thought you knew what I was referencing. Guess you just can't keep up with my sharp wit. Oh look, you're doing that dick thing again. Please stop being a male body part.

Because that's affectionate. She's a true charmer, really. Also I think you did cry. Just admit it, you'll feel better if you let it out. Oh you're giving the girls massages? You sure you aren't giving yourself one?

They are not. They are cute and fluffy. And why do I have a bad feeling about this?

Bryce

[Fritz Towler]

Yes, I am cheating on you. With someone who actually listens.

Sorry for being a dick. Not. It's just such a big part of who I am, if you catch my drift. (; <--- Oh, look, it's one of my new bros.

Isn't she, though? Most girls would nearly lick your face right off, but not Eli. Nope, she really wants to you to get the impact of her feelings. Original, that one is. Okay, I cried - but because I was laughing so damn hard. Sorry, my name isn't Bryson Towler. I don't need to give myself a massage. I've got girls to do that for me.

I wouldn't know why you've got a bad feeling. I'm not a therapist. Figure it out yourself.

- Fritz

[Bryson Towler]

How dare you? I do listen. I listen all the time. Doesn't mean I actually do what you tell me, but I heard you.

I'd say small part of who you are, if you catch my drift. But apology would have been accepted if you didn't bring those smilies into it. You're a betrayer. Brother betrayer.

Most girls would lick my face off? Oh Fritz, are you calling me beautiful? I'm touched, truly. And couldn't people just view her feelings from afar? Couldn't she take them out on a pillow and someone uninjured can shout "Oh Eli, you do care!" I think that would be more effective. More importantly: you did cry! I'm ignoring that last bit.

Hey, I'm not the one with tissues here. I'm just pointing out the obvious. Oh and what girls?

Well, there are many reasons I should be nervous. I just can't pick one in particular.

Bryce