Fritz

[Devyn Oberlin]

Towler,

So there's a party on the 30th and you're going with me as my date. Don't get the wrong idea. This isn't a question, this is a statement, because you're coming with me no matter what. Feel free to make your crude comments now and get them over with because I definitely won't have the patience to deal with them later.

It's fancy dress, by the way. Can you at least attempt to look good?

Devyn

P.S. If you even think about asking what's in it for you, I'll kill you.

[Fritz Towler]

Devyn,

A party? Why haven't I heard about this? Who the fuck didn't invite me? I will happily go with you. It'll be the first of several dates for us. Let's cherish it.

Crude comments? Never! Ugh, fancy dress? My dear, I always look good. I guess you've forgotten, which is understandable as we haven't seen each other in several weeks....

Yours,
Fritz

P.S. Fine, I won't ask. I'll just tell you to go panty-less.

[Devyn Oberlin]

Towler,

Big surprise, I'm more popular than you are. Get over it. The first of several dates, ha. Don't kid yourself.

Okay, well all I'm saying is that you'd better fucking look better than normal. And don't be high or drunk or both or any form of intoxicated, for that matter, before this party. Be perfectly sober.

Pick me up at 7, we'll go together.

Devyn

P.S. No.

[Fritz Towler]

Devyn,

We're both popular in our own ways. I'm not kidding myself.

I will look so amazing, that if you were a guy, you'd go gay just for me. I will be perfectly, promise. But, I mean, we can drink at the party, yeah?

Works for me.

Yours,
Fritz

P.S. I guess I'll have to take them off with my teeth, then.

[Devyn Oberlin]

Towler,

Whatever. We'll see.

That didn't even make sense because wouldn't you rather me be straight for you? But okay. Yes, you can drink when you get there. Just be sober beforehand.

Devyn

P.S. You're not getting a second date with that attitude and behavior.

[Fritz Towler]

Devyn,

Ahha! There is a chance, just like I always knew there would be.

I said, if you were a guy. Nevermind. Got it.

Yours,
Fritz

P.S. You're the one who said to get my "crude comments" out. Now you're telling me to basically shut up. Which one is it?

P.P.S. You'd be totally hot in femdom.

[Devyn Oberlin]

Towler,

I said 'we'll see' which means exactly that. We'll see. That doesn't imply that there's a concrete possibility that you'll get another chance.

Devyn

P.S. Merlin, you're such a dramatic little bitch. Fine, get them all out now. I don't want you to be fucking around on the 30th because everything needs to be perfect and.

P.P.S. I hate you.

[Fritz Towler]

Devyn,

But it means that you're already considering it.

Yours,
Fritz

P.S. If I'm fucking anything on the 30th, it's you.

P.P.S. I love you, too.

P.P.P.S. Wait, who the fuck is this party for, anyway?

[Devyn Oberlin]

Towler,

No it doesn't. It means I might consider it based on how this one goes, and if you follow everything I tell you to do without questioning it.

Devyn

P.S. What a coincidence, you're the second guy in one day that's told me that exact thing. I'd almost say that you should feel special about that fact somehow.

P.P.S. Fuck off, seriously.

P.P.P.S. Does it really matter? You've already said yes.

[Fritz Towler]

Devyn,

Domination Devyn. That's hot.

Who was the other guy who said he wanted to fuck you? Well, consider yourself one lucky girl, then! All these young men throwing themselves at you.

It doesn't matter. I'm merely curious.

Yours,
Fritz

[Devyn Oberlin]

Towler,

This would be the part where I'd counter that by telling you that you're hot, but I'm not the biggest fan of telling straight lies of that nature. (:

Do you ever shut up?

Rose Weasley and Sebastian Nott are hosting a party at the Nott Manor. Happy now?

Devyn

[Fritz Towler]

Devyn,

You're right. I'm not hot; I'm dashing.

Hey now. You're the one who contacted me, remember?

Seb Nott? Ah, that explains So you're using

I am, thank you. This is exciting, actually. I've always wanted to see the Nott Manor.

Yours,
Fritz

[Devyn Oberlin]

Towler,

I beg to differ.

Yes, I did, but I thought you might have taken these past couple of weeks to grow up a bit. Clearly you haven't.

Alright, good. Even if you didn't want to see it you would still be seeing it.

Devyn

[Fritz Towler]

Devyn,

You can beg all you want, sweetie.

Ah, but see, if I had grown up in the last few weeks, then going to the party together wouldn't be as fun. I wouldn't be the Fritz you thought you were demanding to go with you.

Good point. But I mainly want to see the look on Nott's face. Now that I think about it, you said Rose Weasley and Seb Nott. Are they an item now or something? And why isn't Chloe throwing the party as well?

Yours,
Fritz

[Devyn Oberlin]

Towler,

You really wish I would. I know that you do. So it sucks to be you.

Whatever lets you sleep at night.

DO NOT EVEN No, they're not a fucking item. Nott doesn't have things with girls, he just shags them. That's the way it is and that's the way it'll always be. The two of them are throwing the party to cheer Chloe up, that's why she's not throwing it herself. It's supposed to be a surprise or some shit.

Devyn

P.S. Stop signing off with 'Yours,' it's not appropriate for our non-existent relationship.